Whenever I am in Kansas City I try to make it to the Nelson-Atkins museum. The first time I went was around 20 years ago. I knew it was a good museum because it had a Van Gogh. Outside of that, I really didn’t know a lot of the artists. But I always appreciated the fine art that was inside. But….
fast forward a couple of years. I began to realize that this museum has so many masterpieces and has some of the best artists works. Plus the best thing is on the weekends… it is free! Where else can you walk in and see works of arts from Caravaggio, Van Gogh, Monet, Andy Warhol, Dorthea Lange, Jackson Pollack and Cezanne… all for free! If you haven’t ever been go! If you have… then do yourself a favor and go again.
Flying…. It used to be one of my biggest fears. I hated it. Studies have sown that 1 in 3 Americans are either anxious about flying or have a fear of flying. I hated everything about it. Walking in the airport. Waiting in line and going through TSA. Sitting and waiting at the gate. The lines that form and all the craziness while boarding the plane. Taking off, and most of all the turbulence. It got so bad that I used to get panic attacks on the plane! It always started with a shortness of breath. Then sweating and a feeling of being cramp in. Within 5 or 10 minutes I would pass out.
But recently, something has changed. I started to let go. Not worry about the plane crashing or being so high. Not thinking about being cramped in a small space for so long. But the more I started thinking about flying the more I felt better about it. Last year in 2018 the FAA handled over 15,000,000 flights! The FAA oversaw 43,000 flights every day! That is just in the United States! I damn near have better odds and winning a million dollar lottery than getting in a place crash.
I have came to enjoy flying. Or at least enjoy it more than I used to. Whenever I get a window seat I find myself taking photos out the window and enjoying being detached from everything for a couple hours. I still hate TSA though.
Last night I went to check out Metallica play at Intrust Bank Arena. I can say without a doubt that this was the best live show I have ever seen. As I was watching them I started to think about the show, the presentation and technical aspect of it. Also what made it the best show I have seen. Lets start with the music. When you go to a show and hear hit after hit after hit it does something to you. It makes you appreciate the band you are seeing even more. The fact that, not only have they lasted so long and have a huge catalog of music, but also that they are still make hits! Amazing when you really think about it. What stood out to me more than anything was the technical aspect of the show. The stage lighting and pyrotechnics was on point. But the sound was second to none! You can tell they have spent years perfecting how they want to sound. The sound was loud without being drowning. The drums you could feel in your chest but also had a pop and snap to them. The real stand out of the show was when the music stopped. I can see why this band has such a huge following and has sold out shows for 30 years. I sat and watched James Hetfield not just thank but talk to everyone as if he really knew them. Took time to say that he knows how hard everyone works and how hard they make their money. So it was Metallica’s job to put on a show worthy of them spending their hard earned money. I have never heard that at a hip-hop show. And I started thinking, 30 years from now how many hip-hop artists will be in Intrust Bank Arena thanking a sold out crowd of almost 16,000 for spending their hard earned money. Not too many.
I had the day off from work. Not for anything special, but for President’s Day. Up until 10 years ago President’s Day was just another day. This is the first job I have had that gives me the day off. Which quite frankly, I could do without. Every year it is too cold to get out and do anything. Plus, President’s Day is one of those weird holidays that only government workers and bank employees have off. Unfortunately I don’t have friends who work at either so I am usually stuck alone trying to fill the day with something that will keep my attention. Most museums are closed on Mondays and lets face it, there isn’t a long list of things to go do and see in this town. I spend the day pacing around the house, looking for something to do. I have never been able to sit in a house all day. The only time I do that is when I am sick, which is even rare. Even on the coldest, snowiest and iciest of days I will get out to go to the store or visit family. So having a Monday in February off is more of a curse than a gift. But I made the most of the day, and yes… I got out of the house. Spent some time writing and a hot mocha and Fairmount Coffee. The drinks are good, the people are nice and even the droopy flowers still had some smell to them. All in all, it was a pretty good day off. But, I am ready to get back t work!
While I was sitting at home sick with the flu bored out of my mind I decided to start watching Game Of Thrones. Sure beat what was in daytime television. So far, so good. Takes me back to all the times going to the renaissance fairs growing up. I still go! Never dressed up though. Doubt I ever will. Never say never though!
I am reading a new book called, “Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less. It is one of those books that I will most likely break out at minimum once a year from now one. Just to go back and refresh myself on everything that was brought up. So far one of the major points is to stop trying to do everything. A person can make their highest contribution towards the things that really matter to them when they choose not to deal with everything else. Narrow your options to focus on what really matters.
How many people do you know that are trying to do too many things or focus on too much. They end up not getting anything done. When they do, if they were to put all their focus into what they truly cared about the outcome out have been so much better. I think of myself and my own life. How can I focus and narrow what I want to focus on at work and family life. I can not be everything to everybody. Nor would I want to be. I can honestly say that a handful of thing truly matter to me. Not clothes, fame, money or even success. Family, photography, traveling and being a good person. That is what truly matters to me. So I give myself permission to stop trying to pursue everything and just the things that truly matter to me.
Do you remember your dreams? The older I get the less I do. Every time I wake up I can tell I have been dreaming. But for some reason I can’t remember what or even what the dream pertained to. I do know this, lately I have been dreaming quite a bit. Anymore the dreams I do remember are the ones closest to real life. I will be dreaming I am working and on air at the radio station. The only difference is I will be in a bigger market or different radio station. Every now and then I dream about people from my past. I still have scary dreams. I can tell because I wake up tense or with anxiety. I have also found out that sometimes when I wake up I am still dreaming. I might wake up and ask the most random question or not make sense at all.
The big question is… what are the meaning to our dreams? Is there a meaning at all? Is it tapping into another part of our mind or consciousness.? There is part of me that doesn’t think dreams have any meaning, but then there is a part of me that believes that dreams are deeper than anyone might ever know. It might tell us something about our existence. It could be a way to float into different dimensions or maybe even be a way to pass through time and space itself. Who knows? Hopefully tonight I dream of the answer, I just hope I don’t forget it in the morning.
One thing I love about radio is two days are never the same. You never know what might happen day to day. The fun times are when we as a staff get out and about and do events. We had a fun one at a middle school where we honored the '“Super Car Kid" of he year. 500 screaming kids was a bit intense, but it was fun. Until you get out and do some events you can never quite understand what it is like to be in radio. The bigger the event, the better. Some of my funnest times in radio where standing back stage in an arena watching people enjoy a show that we all planned and worked on for months. Doesn't get any better than that.
That is right. My new place of zen is the laundry mat. Let me start off by saying I hate doing laundry. I don’t just hate it, I despise it. I never take the time to separate whites and colors and I cant fold a t-shirt to save my life. I thin if I were to ever be sentenced to an eternity of hell after my life comes to an end it would be doing laundry with country music playing in the background. So why might you ask is the laundry mat my new zen place? Well for a couple reasons. First, as I stated before I hate doing laundry. It takes me about 4 days to do 3 loads. So by going to the laundry mat it forces me to get it done. I have a perfectly good working washer and dryer in my basement but in 1 quick hour at the laundry mat using multiple washers and dryers I can get done with all my clothes. Second, it gets me out of the house. Today was a nasty cold winter day, but I had to get the laundry done. I hate sitting in the house all day. So if I can kill two birds with one stone, get out the house AND get my laundry done then I consider that a win-win situation. Most importantly it is a little get away. I chill, put in my headphones relax for an hour and people watch. There are always so many interesting people there. Young, old, well to do and poor. Some people are doing an entire months worth bringing in bag after bag of clothes. Others washing there pricey curtains or comforters in the big industrial washers set on delicate. If you haven’t been to the laundry mat in awhile, time some time out of your busy schedule and go. IF you have never been to a laundry mat to wash your clothes… then you just don’t know what you are missing.
I was out shopping with Brandi today when I came across a four foot statue of Buddha. IF I would have had the money and space for it, I would have bought it. Quite often I try to think about Buddha’s four noble truths, and having a four foot statue staring at me every time would help keep it on my mind. I you are not sure up to speed on the Four Noble Truths they are as follows.
Life is suffering. - Are lives are a struggle. And we as humans can not find ultimate happiness or satisfaction in anything we experience.
2. Life is suffering because of craving and attachment. - We will NEVER be able to satisfy all our cravings. A bigger house, more money, always wanting to be the best at something. Our ego is desire and keeps us in a state of constant suffering.
3. Put and end to our ego and craving, we will put and end to our suffering.
4. The path to end suffering is the Eight Fold Path. - Living a balanced life will help end the suffering.
End the desire, end the suffering. Sounds easy. But I find it is extremely hard. But every time time I have ended or tamed my desire and my ego, I have felt so much better in the long run. Do I need a new car? Should I be eating all this candy and junk food? Do I need the most expensive clothes? Do I ned a lot of clothes? OF course the answer is no to all of them. There is so much suffering in the world today. Why shouldn’t we all at least try to end the suffering we can control, which is our own.